Progressive muscle relaxation (PMR) is simple to describe: you tense one group of muscles for a few seconds, let go, notice the difference, and move on to the next group until you have worked through the whole body. Done slowly in bed, it takes about fifteen minutes and leaves most people noticeably heavier and calmer.
It is also one of the oldest and best-established relaxation methods in sleep care. Relaxation training, with PMR as its most common form, has been a standard component of behavioural treatment for insomnia for decades and is included in cognitive behavioural therapy for insomnia (CBT-I), which the NHS and European guidelines recommend as the first-line treatment.
The script is below. Before it, a short explanation of why tensing first helps, because understanding that makes the exercise work better.
Why tense a muscle you want to relax?
Most of us carry tension we cannot feel: a slightly clenched jaw, shoulders an inch too high, a fist curled under the pillow. You cannot let go of something you do not know you are holding.
Tensing a muscle deliberately, then releasing it, gives you a clear "before and after" so you can recognise what loose actually feels like, and a muscle that has just been contracted tends to relax more fully than one you simply tell to relax. The method was developed by the American physician Edmund Jacobson in the 1920s and 1930s, and the principle has not changed since.
For sleep, there is a second benefit: PMR occupies attention with something physical and orderly. People who cannot switch off at night often do better with PMR than with breathing alone, because there is more to do and less room for the mind to run.
In short: Tense, hold for five seconds, release, rest for fifteen. Notice the contrast. Move to the next group. That is the whole method.
Before you begin
- Lie on your back if you can, arms by your sides, legs uncrossed. If you sleep on your side, that is fine too; just adapt the leg and arm steps as needed.
- Lights off or very dim. Phone away.
- Take three slow breaths, letting the out-breath be longer than the in-breath. If you want a fuller warm-up, two minutes of the extended-exhale pattern works well.
- Tense at about two-thirds of your full effort: enough to feel the muscle clearly, never enough to cramp. Release on an out-breath. Never strain.
- Timing for every step: tense for about five seconds, release all at once, then rest for ten to fifteen seconds, paying attention to the muscle as it softens. The rest is where the relaxation happens, so do not rush it.
The full script: feet to face
Read it through once, then work from memory. Only the order matters, not the wording.
1. Feet
Curl your toes downwards, as if gripping the sheet. Hold for five. Let go. Feel the toes spread and the soles of the feet soften. Rest.
Now pull your toes up towards your shins so the calves stretch. Hold. Release. Notice the warmth in the feet and ankles.
2. Calves
Point your toes away from you and tighten the calf muscles. Hold for five. Release. Calves cramp easily; if yours do, use only a gentle squeeze, or skip the tensing and simply pay attention to the calves for fifteen seconds.
3. Thighs
Press the backs of your knees down into the mattress, tightening the front of the thighs. Hold. Let go. Then squeeze the thighs together, or press the knees together if lying on your side. Hold. Release. Feel the legs become heavy, as if they are sinking into the bed.
4. Buttocks and hips
Squeeze the buttocks together. Hold for five. Release. Notice the pelvis settle.
5. Stomach
Pull your stomach in towards your spine and tighten it, as if bracing for a nudge. Hold. Release, and let the belly rise freely on the next in-breath. Take two ordinary breaths before moving on.
6. Chest and back
Breathe in fully, hold the breath and feel the chest expand. Hold for five. Breathe out slowly and let the chest fall. Then gently draw the shoulder blades together behind you. Hold. Release, and let the back spread wide against the mattress.
7. Hands
Make fists with both hands. Hold for five. Open the hands and let the fingers curl naturally. Feel the tension drain from the palms and knuckles.
8. Forearms and upper arms
Bend your wrists so the fingers point up towards the ceiling, tightening the forearms. Hold. Release. Then bend the elbows and tighten the biceps, like a small, lazy flex. Hold. Let the arms flop. Rest and notice the arms grow heavy.
9. Shoulders
Lift the shoulders up towards your ears. Hold for five. Let them drop. This is where most people discover they have been carrying the day, so give it a longer rest, twenty seconds or so.
10. Neck
Press the back of your head gently into the pillow. Hold. Release. Then, only if comfortable, tuck the chin slightly towards the chest. Hold. Release. Keep this one gentle; the neck does not need much.
11. Jaw and mouth
Clench the teeth lightly and press the lips together. Hold for five. Release, and let the jaw hang slightly open with the lips barely touching. A loose jaw is one of the strongest signals of relaxation, and many people are surprised how tight theirs was.
12. Eyes and forehead
Squeeze the eyes tightly shut. Hold. Release, and let the eyelids rest closed without effort. Then raise the eyebrows as high as they go, wrinkling the forehead. Hold. Let go, and feel the forehead smooth and widen.
13. The whole body
Finally, take a slow breath and, as you breathe out, imagine a wave of heaviness passing from the top of your head down to your feet. If any area has crept back to tense, give it one more brief squeeze and release. Then stop doing anything at all.
What to do if your mind wanders
It will, probably several times. When you notice you are thinking about work rather than your left calf, simply return to whichever muscle group you were on, or the next one if you cannot remember. The return is part of the practice, not a sign that it has failed.
If you catch yourself monitoring for sleep ("is it working yet?"), that is the most common way relaxation goes wrong. PMR produces a relaxed body; sleep is a side effect you cannot force. Our guide to mindfulness for sleep explains why letting go of the effort matters.
Adapting the script for pain, injury or limited movement
PMR should never hurt. If you have arthritis, a bad back, a recent injury, a hernia, poorly controlled high blood pressure, or any condition where clenching muscles is unwise, adapt it:
- Skip the tensing for any painful area. Instead, spend the same fifteen seconds simply noticing that area and imagining it softening. This is closer to a body scan, which uses attention rather than contraction and works well for people who cannot tense safely.
- Use a lighter squeeze everywhere. A third of your effort is enough to feel the contrast.
- Leave out the neck and lower back steps if you have problems there. The rest of the script still works.
- Do not hold your breath during the tensing if you have a heart or blood-pressure condition. Breathe normally throughout and simply tense on an out-breath.
If you are unsure whether it is suitable for you, a physiotherapist or GP can advise. The general principle: if tensing hurts, do not tense.
What the evidence says
Relaxation training is one of the longest-studied non-drug approaches to insomnia. A 2006 review by Charles Morin and colleagues in the journal Sleep listed relaxation among the psychological approaches with reasonable support, particularly for people whose problem is falling asleep rather than staying asleep. The 2017 European insomnia guideline reaches a similar conclusion: relaxation is a useful component, though less effective on its own than the full CBT-I package.
That is an honest summary. PMR is not a standalone answer and works best alongside a regular wake time and getting out of bed when you are lying awake for long stretches. If sleep problems have lasted for months and are affecting your days, it is worth reading when to see a GP about sleep and asking about CBT-I.
Following a recording instead
Many people learn PMR from a recorded voice and only later do it from memory. A recording removes the need to remember the order and sets the pace, which helps when you are tired. Free PMR recordings are widely available, and our guide to guided relaxation for sleep explains what to look for in a voice and length.
If you listen lying down, comfort is the main issue: wired earbuds and side-sleeping do not mix.
For following a recorded PMR script in bed
Soft headband headphones or small sleep earbuds let you follow a guided relaxation lying on your side without disturbing a partner.
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Headband sleep headphones
Example: SleepPhones; CozyPhones; Musicozy
Headband headphones put flat speakers inside a stretchy fabric band that doubles as a light-blocking eye cover for some people. Models are marketed as wired or Bluetooth, with the speakers usually removable so the band can be washed.
- Best for
- Side sleepers who want audio without anything inside the ear
- Key feature
- Thin, flat speakers inside a soft fabric headband
- Why it may help
- Ordinary earbuds press into the ear when you lie on your side. A headband keeps the speaker flat against the ear so you can listen to sleep sounds or guided relaxation comfortably.
- Worth knowing
- Audio quality is basic and bass-light; the band can feel warm in summer; battery life varies by model.
Small in-ear sleep earbuds
Example: Anker Soundcore Sleep series; Bose Sleepbuds (discontinued, second-hand only)
Sleep-specific earbuds are marketed as smaller and flatter than standard earbuds so that lying on a pillow does not push them into the ear. Some models are designed mainly for masking sounds via an app; check whether a model streams normal Bluetooth audio if that matters to you.
- Best for
- People who want noise masking and audio in a compact form
- Key feature
- Low-profile earbuds designed to sit flush with the ear
- Why it may help
- They combine some passive noise blocking with audio, which suits people who want both a plug and a sound in one device.
- Worth knowing
- Fit varies widely between ears; app dependence on some models; batteries degrade over time.
Tonight's version
Lights off. Three slow breaths. Then feet, calves, thighs, buttocks, stomach, chest, hands, arms, shoulders, neck, jaw, eyes, forehead: five seconds tense, fifteen seconds rest, one group at a time. If you drift off at the shoulders, good; that is the point, not a failure to finish. If you reach the end still awake, lie quietly and let the heaviness do its work. The rest of our Relaxation guides cover what to try if PMR calms you but does not send you off.
Sources and further reading
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